Could my PE teacher be a secret evil unicorn?

Probably not, to be honest.

Unicorns don’t exist. Even if they did, they would probably just be a less wrinkly species of rhinoceros.

Also they would be such a big tourist attraction that they would get extremely overweight from all the free cupcakes offered through the cage bars by worshipping children.


Now that’s cleared up.

What? Did you say something? Oh. Yes. Well, I thought she would be one if they existed. A big green spotty one. With pointed metal hooves for killing defenceless bunnies.

Because? What do you mean because? Because she puts us through unbearable TORTURE every half term. BEEP TEST torture.

The beep test is defined (by google) as a ‘multi-stage fitness test in which you must do 20 metre shuttle runs in time with the beeps until they get too quick for you’. Well, that is what we have to do, but you have no idea how tiring it gets! It’s not even your legs that get tired! It’s how thirsty the running makes you. By the time I drop out I’m usually gasping for air, but you still have to wait until everyone else has finished to get a drink of water!

Can you imagine an evil unicorn with a whistle and a clipboard making you go through that?


I’m pretty sure you can.

I wouldn’t be surprised if she really did turn out to be one, but maybe that’s just the lack of oxygen talking.

Published by Lily

Doodles, cute stuff, stationary, I love it all! :D

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